2010 Reflection: Sorry, I’m An Idealist

No, I am not but looking at the state of the country, I am trying to be one

(Doing something ideal means different thing to different people. Image source: http://sentense.me/)

This year, instead making the usual New Year resolutions (which I know I would have a hard time keeping), I thought of doing something different. I have my own set of rules that I live by day in, day out and I fully aware that no one is perfect (I would be a fool if I claim to be one).

So, I don’t impose my personal rules on others (I have my shortcomings too) but it is whole different thing when it comes to rules of the office / work. There is a fine line between what I think you need to do and what I say you must do. At most times, I tend to close one eye on things but sometimes it gets too obvious (until it gets noticed by others and questions & accusations start flying around). For example, punctuality – for me, it is OK to come in late, once in a while, and with a good excuse (the usual like car broke down or had to bring family member to the clinic) and have something to eat so that you have enough energy for the day. There is no difference with what we did in schools – try walking in to the class after the bell has rang and you find yourself in detention class. So, what’s the indifference at work?

But enough about others (I am pretty sure that they have good reasons) – this is post is more about me than others. What I will be telling myself as I drive out from home in the morning? What are the “checkpoints” for me to make the day a great day? Certainly certain things that was said and implied in 2010 was said and implied in the wrong way but after a long breath (over several days, arghhhh!) I decided to take it up in a more positive way. What more a better way to kick myself in the butt for improvement than waking up to the underlying truth of my weaknesses and shortcomings from those in the “observation posts”. Thanks a lot to those who gave me the “list” of my weaknesses – in my endeavor to be more idealists, I intend to work even harder on this (keyword – intend).

One thing I definitely need to work on in 2011 is keeping awake during “the day” – it has become a routine that in the morning for couple of minutes, my body tends to simply “shutdown”. A cup of strong coffee in the morning has been the temporary permanent measure that I have “deployed” in recent months to ensure I remain “perked” up at least in the mornings (somehow evenings are the best time to work). And in 2011, since my son need to wake up early for school, it has been crucial for me to go to bed early as well (otherwise my son will use this as excuse to sleep late and have a hard time waking up in the mornings). Hopefully I catch up on some sleep early at night.

Another thing I need to work on in 2011 is control of my temper – not so prevalent at workplace but definitely show the uglier side when I am on the road. In 2010, I lost count of the times; I decided to ram some pesky idiots on the road that earlier had endangered me and others on the road and give a damn about it. But somehow common sense and unfounded restrain comes in at the very last moment.

Else where, motorist discipline on major highways have improved – perhaps with more people armed with cameras and the Government opening up an online submission of evidence but the city roads are still crawling with idiots who don’t deserved to be on the road in the first place – cutting into other’s lanes without any indicators, using no-entry roads as quick exits, jumping queue at the toll plaza, riding motorbike without any helmet and sometimes without any front and rear lights. For that very reason, not all who been a road-bully victim are angels. Anyway, it is better to stay cool on the road than becoming a “pest controller”.

At home, year in, year out – at the beginning of the year (and every time now and then) I often get a short lecture from my HEO (House Executive Officer) on what she expects from me when I am at home. The list is too exhaustive to be posted here (ha, ha). But perhaps with my son need to get up early and my wife is taking care of transportation before she leaves for work and weekends is as tight as weekdays, I might as well put more effort into house work (hope my HEO is not reading this – this does not mean I am putting my “commitments” in writing).

As I said, I am not an idealists (at least it is more realistic than being a perfectionist) but I am trying to be one – I guess the journey is more important than the destination, at least, for now. There is plenty of days in 2011 to make this happen.

P.s. It is ok if the post above does not make any sense whatsoever to you – it is still early into 2011 and my mind still tied to 2010

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2 thoughts on “2010 Reflection: Sorry, I’m An Idealist

  1. Pingback: Unnecessary Provocations « BJ Thoughts…

  2. Pingback: Living Longer « BJ Thoughts…

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