The Other Side of Parenting


Read these first

silhouettes-of-parents-and-kids

(What young children really need is a strong, supportive and loving parents. Image source: http://eduart4kids.com)

Another innocent life taken away all because of sheer recklessness:-

A four-year-old boy died after being left inside his father’s car at the parking lot of SM Kuala Nerang about 45km from Alor Setar. The deceased, identified as Muhammad Aqil Arfan Adnan, 4, had begun the day accompanying his parents Adnan Salleh and Asiah Abu when they left their house at Kampung Padang Durian, Pendang, Kedah.

They left their house about 6.45am and Adnan sent his wife to the school where she taught before going to the school where he works as a religious teacher. He forgot to drop him off at kindergarten Perdana ABC at Kuala Nerang.

At 4.00pm as his father went back to his car, he found his son was unconscious. He rushed him to Kuala Nerang Hospital but the boy was pronounced dead.

(Source)

Then couple of days ago, I watched a local TV program of a single mom who was struggling to meet the ends for her small children – 4 of them.

None of the children were going to school and they all don’t have any birth certificates. The eldest of the 4 instead helps his mom to sell snacks at night and they barely makes it on a daily basis. It seems to be a typical case of the poor family in this country except for one thing which made me very angry indeed. Apparently the lady have another 3 kids – all grown up but are not staying together to help the lady and their siblings. The eldest, a son is in jail for criminal activities whilst the other 2, girls had ran away from the family. The father used to be in jail but had recently been released but had decided to stay away from the family. The remaining young children future remains bleak and the lady is really helpless on what to do next.

Whilst it is tragic, the question that begs to be answered is why some people have kids but does not take the trouble, pride and responsibility in taking care of their kids? How could the father could have forgotten that his kid was inside the car. Imagine the suffering that the young child would have before he died. How could the father simply washes his hands from taking care of his kids but the idiot had plenty of time, fathering whole lot of them. There was no excuse whatsoever for these acts and in case of the parents abandoning the kids, these irresponsible parents should be made to pay dearly.

Having kids is a big, big responsibility and once 2 people have decided to have kids, nothing else comes before their kids and their welfare.

And one of the main things that parents can do in the best interest of their kids is making sure they go to school and get a decent education. The lady with the 4 young kids expressed to the reporter in the TV program that all she wanted to do to get her kids to school but without birth certificates, that is not possible for now unless the Government steps in to help the family. Then there is the issue of the family making ends meet with the single mother not having a permanent job and whatever she makes and sells on daily basis is used back for the family’s expenses and for the raw materials for the next day.

I was lucky that my parents especially my Dad held that education was far more important that saving up for a new house or car or good things in life. We all stayed on rented house for most of our life until I bought a house on my own. We often take the bus and walked a lot back then. And having chicken for our meals was a luxury that came perhaps once in a month. But somehow there was no short of money for school tuition, stationery and revision books. No matter what was the situation, my Dad always had the money for our education..

In general, most parents are doing well when it comes to having the right responsibility and care of their children and myself and my wife do have our hands full handling our 2 little bosses. As my dad have done in the past, I emphasized the same on education and even though my children fares slightly better than me when I was at their age, their ultimate goal remains the same.

And there is another aspect of being a good parents and that is to be around when the children needs us – providing that support, teaching the rights to say and do and assuring them that they can always count on us. I travel a lot so I do get to miss a lot of my children’s activities and first time occasions but when I am at home, I make it a point to spend as much as possible time with my kids. When I come back from work, one of first questions that I ask my son is “how was school?” or “how was your day” and followed by “have you finished your home work?” of course. My daughter still young but she do fight her brother to get a bigger share of my attention. She will butt in with her own report for the day. We sleep late almost every day but despite being very tired, it is a very rewarding feeling.

And I say this again, having kids is a big, big responsibility and once 2 people have decided to have kids, nothing else comes before their kids and their welfare. If you can’t do that, don’t have kids – just simple as that.

Advertisements

MH370: Interpol hits back at Malaysia


interpol

(It is not the first time the Malaysian authorities had some differences with Interpol. This is from the Wikipedia – Journalist Hamza Kashgari, who in February 2012 fled his home country of Saudi Arabia to avoid prosecution for apostasy, and was subsequently arrested in Malaysia. The Royal Malaysian Police initially asserted that they had arrested Kashgari because they had received an Interpol Red Notice request to do so. However, Interpol stated that no such notice had been issued, and the Malaysian police retracted their claim. Image source: http://www.intelligence-sec.com)

I still recall the comment made over Business Week on how Malaysian authorities initial handling of the MH370 crisis:-

“They’re handling a huge global issue as if it was domestic politics,”

We have made some positive progress on how we handle things but then again, somehow the above statement still lingers on with this:-

On Wednesday Malaysian Home Minister Ahmad Zahid Hamidi told parliament in Kuala Lumpur that consulting the database was too time consuming for immigration officers and caused airport delays. Interpol shot back saying Malaysia’s decision to not consult the database before allowing travellers to enter the country or board planes ‘cannot be defended by falsely blaming technology or Interpol’.

“If there is any responsibility or blame for this failure, it rests solely with Malaysia’s Immigration Department,” the France-based organisation said.

Interpol said that it takes “just seconds to reveal whether a passport is listed, with recent tests providing results in 0.2 seconds”. While some countries consult the database more than a hundred million times a year, “in 2014 prior to the tragic disappearance of Malaysia Airlines Flight MH370, Malaysia’s Immigration Department did not conduct a single check of passengers’ passports against Interpol’s databases,” the agency said.

“Had Malaysia consulted Interpol’s database, the fact that both passengers were using stolen passports would have been discovered almost instantaneously,” it added.

(Source)

No thanks to the Minister who had discounted the Interpol with flimsy reasons, you now know why Malaysia looks really stupid and seemed incompetent in handling it’s affairs?

Well, shame on us because Malaysia given the available money for overseas shopping & expensive up-keeping of pandas (that will never belong to us in the end), there seems to be  a severe lack of money to beef up the necessary technology and the infrastructure for national security.

Well, shame on us again because our own neighbor down south, Singapore is one of about 70 member states of Interpol that actually cross checks with Interpol database and yet I have not seen any airport delays when I flew in onto Singapore (on the contrary to the excuse given by Malaysia that the checking against the Interpol database will cause airport delays). The last time I went, it hardly took a minute for immigration clearance.

In fact, I have held up for almost a minute or two at immigration counters in some airports in some countries but I have no complaints on such delays. The strictness is inconvenient but highly understandable. The same should apply the same for foreigners coming in to this country. Why we are worried of causing inconvenient of a few seconds to foreigners but causes a major inconvenient to the national security on the long run. Interpol says the latest test shows that it only takes 0.2 seconds.

Even if the immigration department decided not to connect to the Interpol database for cross checking on the travel documents, there is still one mystery that remains unresolved, remains unanswered.

The two Iranians came in using Iranian passport but left on stolen Austrian & Italian passports. Didn’t the immigration department captured the two Iranians biometric and passport details when they entered? Then why the same verification was done when they departed? The system would have flagged the different passport for the same biometrics and the immigration department could have stopped the 2 Iranians on the spot. Further, wouldn’t that “internal” verification been faster than connecting to Interpol database? So, why this has not been done and the only excuse that the Minister can come up is that verification is time consuming & it causes airport delays – an excuse that implies that national security can take the back seat as long as there are no delays at the airport.

Thus no wonder there has been nothing but brickbats for the Home Minister in this aspect.

From Malaysian Insider:-

Notice their culture of always blaming someone else for their own laziness. Until today none has step forward to assume responsibility. Even the RMAF being keeping quiet hoping that no one will bring up their failure in protecting our airspace.

Right now their own incompetence stood out like a sore thumb yet they are unaware the world is watching them with disbelief. Plane turn back in distress, the deputy minister simply shot an unbelievable cooked up answer. Not a tinge of remorseful but continue trying to lie their way out.

It is just the way BN government handles politics. Never their fault always someone else’s fault. Never admit mistake always someone else’s mistake. Even worse while not admitting to mistake our minister have the face to criticise and blame the Chinese press, the Interpol etc.

Some of our ministers are still living in the days of typewriters and cabinet filing!

And from Malaysiakini:-

Again caught with our pants down. It shows the Immigrations is not bothered, do not know or understand the Interpol database and yet have not cared to inform or consult Interpol about their problem. For Zahid to immediately blame Interpol and be defensive also shows he has not bothered to check and find out the truth. This is typical of arrogant BN ministers. They always get away with stupid excuses inside Malaysia but are made to look foolish when it comes to international issues.

Immigration is compromised, security is compromised. No wonder we have so many illegal immigrants here with their families.

MH370 may have just opened the can of worms in Malaysian accountability, transparency and responsibility out into the open and simply reinforces the missing notion of a Ministerial responsibility, which remains an alien concept and illusive in this country, to remain unchanged until we see a complete shakedown of the Government. We are waiting to see what excuse the Minister will come up in light of the Interpol’s revelations. Hopefully he will admit the shortcomings and move on with concrete actions to address the shortcomings and not come up with another flimsy, stupid and illogical excuses.

Aminulrasyid’s Death


I have to agree with the police this time:-

The Selangor police chief Khalid Abu Bakar said he will not apologise to the family of police shooting victim Aminulrasyid Amzah, but has urged the teenager’s family to say sorry instead for parental negligence

(Source: Malaysiakini)

In the meantime, Blogger Kickdefella has donated some cash to the family of the policeman now being charged for the death of the young boy.

Hopefully more help will come in for the policeman who was on duty as oppose to the boy who suppose to be at home and not be driving illegally at wee hours.

We need more policemen on the streets, not in jails.

Read Also

Politicising a Death